Thursday, April 10, 2008

The Big D

I may have isolated one of the reasons that I can't seem to write much about my diabetes. It seems like every time I sit down to write about it, it comes out as some sort of exegesis on Life With Diabetes instead of what MY life with diabetes is all about.

And I'm thinking that that may be because of my attitude about my diabetes. What is my attitude, you ask? Well...that's the thing...I'm not entirely sure. I just know that I don't really like to think about my diabetes much, except for the troubleshooting aspects of it, like why did I have low blood sugar this afternoon, or how can I get my blood sugars to stay down after breakfast? Because when I do think about what my life with diabetes has been like, I can't help but feel regret for the life I might have had without diabetes.

Which, personally, I think is crazy! Because I know that my life would be so very different without diabetes...who knows how drastically some tiny little difference could have altered my life's path? And I am so happy with where I am, so in love with Ben and so amazed by my love for James, that I don't want to have experienced life without diabetes, because without it, I wouldn't have them, and I wouldn't be the person that I am today.

But I sure am ready for that cure. How about tomorrow? Please?


Donna said...

I definitely wouldn't be the same person if I didn't have diabetes, either. But I don't think about what kind of person I would be. I'll just wait & see if/when there is a cure. Then I can be surprised!

Ana and Emery's Mama said...

uhhh oh...if I am reading this on Saturday, what happened to Friday? The BloPoMo gods will be displeased.