I know you think I'm a freak now. But I'm ok with that.

It's funny how we (people in this culture and this time) always talk about the horrors of being a woman. You know, the pain of childbirth, the scary PMS commercials, and all the bad things we have to say about menopause.

Well, guess what? I say it's all bull. I had a painfree and drugfree childbirth, and it liberated me. It made me realize that my body is not broken just because I'm a woman, so why should all these normal female events be so bad? (And yes, I had heard this idea before in all my liberal college education-type studies, but you know, nothing like experience to drive home the point.)

It's all about perception. You see, most of us here, today, won't have painfree childbirth, or for that matter, joyful PMS, because the idea that it's bad is so deeply embedded in our culture conscience. (Is my anthropology degree showing yet?) This reminds me of the true story of people who fall down dead because they think they're going to. See, the death is real, but there isn't a physiological reason behind it...they willed themselves dead by thinking they were going to die. And if someone can do something so powerful, is it really that hard to understand that I'm saying not that these pains aren't real, but simply that they don't have to be? That maybe they're real but they come from a place that is not in our bodies?

Now...why the heck am I getting all anthropological and weird on you? Well, because I'm in the middle of a big ol' PMS day, my third post-pregnancy PMS, and for the third time, I've noticed something: being in this place mentally is actually good for me. It is the one time that I can think about all the negative aspects of life constructively, that I have a chance at creatively solving these things instead of just muddling through them.

So even though I've felt pretty frazzled, I know it's weird but...in a way I'm grateful, because I've had all these same problems for awhile now, and this has actually galvanized me to do something about them, and helped me figure out things that might help.

So, thank you, PMS, for showing me where I've gone wrong and helping me find my way.

I hope I haven't completely freaked you out or confused you. I'm just sayin', is all. If it doesn't make sense to you, no biggie. But if it does...well, who wouldn't want to have these things be painless and joyful?